Whenever I think we have written about every possible topic in the Not Alone Series they come up with something better than I can even think of! This week we are talking about Readiness. This is something I have thought about a lot but I’ve never actually written my thoughts on it down so here we go.
How ready do you think you are for your vocation? Are you ready to be committed to your vocation within the next year, or two years? That means being married (and maybe with a baby), taking religious vows, or telling people you’re not interested in marriage and plan to remain single for life. What do you still need to work on or change about yourself before you’re ready? Have you thought you were ready before? How have you become better prepared over time? Married ladies can chime in, too: how did you know it was the right time to get hitched?
I feel like readiness is something they talk for EVERY.SINGLE.SCENARIO nowadays.
There are TONS of those “list posts” on the internet about it. You’re ready to get married if, 10 ways you know you are ready for kids, 10 ways you are ready to quit your job, 10 reasons you are ready to move, etc.
But really how will you ever 100% chance know? Will you ever know? Or do you just take the leap of faith and see what happens? I think it’s kind of a combination of both.
How ready do you think you are for your vocation?
I think I am very ready to be married. I feel I have a good grasp on handling my finances, cooking, cleaning, and all the other “adulting” things.
Are you ready to be committed to your vocation within the next year, or two years?
Yes. I remember when I was 22 and still in college telling people I could see myself getting married right then. Even though I never even dated. In my 20s I just always felt ready to move on to the next step in life – marriage.
What do you still need to work on or change about yourself before you’re ready?
I know I’m not perfect and there are several things I can improve about myself. But I think we always have things to improve.
One thing I know I could improve is selfishness. Being single or even in a dating relationship it’s really easy to do whatever you want whenever you want. Which I don’t really consider being selfish it’s just how life is. But when you get more serious/engaged/married you have to put your spouse and their feelings before your own.
I feel over the last 2 years I’ve gotten really good at managing my money. I’ve been using You Need A Budget (YNAB) religiously to manage and control my money and categorizing everything. And yeah sometimes I overspend on stupid things and don’t save as much but I don’t feel like it’s way out of control.
Where all of that is awesome one place I worry about is income. My income is VERY LOW. It’s nowhere near the “living wage” I feel it should be…especially as a college educated person. And yeah I know college doesn’t equal a good job making $30,000/yr but it does get frustrating sometimes. I also struggle because I LOVE my job it just doesn’t allow me the freedom financially I’d like – living on my own (I still live with my mom), paying off debt, etc.
But I get torn just because you have these financial problems and can’t support yourself does it mean you should be alone and not get married? I say no. But others I know would disagree with me.
How have you become better prepared over time?
Yes. Obviously I’ve grown up a lot since I was 22 and felt ready. I’ve learned more about food and cooking, finances, jobs, resumes, and just life in general.
You’ll never be ready to get married or have kids but I think I am ready enough to enjoy life with a partner vs alone. We can help each other with all these big decisions which is always easier than alone.
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