I’m back for another Five Minute Friday….on Sunday…better late than never as I always say. Life got crazy between Friday and now I am ready to WRITE (go figure that is this weeks word).
I wasn’t going to do a Five Minute Friday this week as it’s now SUNDAY night but the tweets that came across there have been tweets from the #FMFParty twitter stream on Friday night that have been stuck in my mind ever since and I decided I needed to write about them. The two tweets were, “Write even when it is hard…” and then the other one was, “The thing with writing is eventually someone is going to want to read what you have to say.”
Yeah that second one is a crazy thought for me. I’ve lived in this world where I felt swallowed by words and people. I send my words via text and tweet and facebook and many of them never even get answered and heard. I’ve been blogging for 3 years and there are tons of days where I feel like no one reads my words or even cares and really somedays I don’t care I write because it’s fun and cathartic for me but other days it’s discouraging.
Then there are the 10+ drafts I have in my drafts folder that are posts that I NEED to write but I’m scared. I’m scared to hurt someones feelings. I’m scared that I’ll be misinterpreted. I’m scared that I’ll get sued (okay now that is a little exaggeration). I’m scared for the mere thought of writing about it will make me cry…and I’m scared to cry and scared to show my emotions. I’ve gone so long just hiding my feelings by laughing at everything…like everything was okay when it wasn’t I was sad, and lonely, and hurt inside and I’m scared for my words to be put out there.